Successful But Stuck? Why Competence Isn’t Enough in the Workplace
Emotional intelligence might be what you need to break through to the next level.
by Maya Hu-Chan
On paper, it seems there’s no reason why Greg has hit a wall in his career. As an executive in a consumer products company, Greg is passionate about the company and its customers. He consistently delivers results, knows the ins and outs of the business, and has a strong executive presence. So why has he not gotten promoted in more than five years? The answer is two simple words: emotional intelligence.
In his book, What Got You Here Won’t Get You There, executive coach Marshall Goldsmith details the habits that limit growth in even the most accomplished leaders—executives and entrepreneurs alike. Many of these behaviors are obvious to others but invisible to the leaders who exhibit them.
This was the case with Greg, and feedback from his peers and team showed just how many of these habits he had. Although they praised his intelligence, confidence, and performance-driven work ethic, he was also described as “cold,” “short,” and “rude.”
Greg was thriving on the technical aspects of his job, but he missed the mark on the interpersonal, emotional intelligence-related parts. And while he might be tempted to dismiss this as irrelevant, emotional intelligence is that extra step it takes to be impactful—whether it’s leading a corporate department or taking your company to the next level as an entrepreneur. In fact, a meta-analysis of multiple studies by Virginia Commonwealth University found that emotional intelligence is a strong predictor of job performance across various industries.
Greg’s journey isn’t over yet. Through coaching, we uncovered the habits that are holding him back and set strategies to fix them. If you’re finding that you’re successful but stuck, some of these might be familiar to you, too.
Stuck in robot mode
Greg is all business, all the time. He doesn’t engage in any of the small talk that allows people to form personal connections—no top-of-the-call questions about weekends or how the kids are doing. While he may think these moments don’t matter to the task at hand, they are crucial to leadership. Research from Harvard Business School uncovered that while most leaders seek to demonstrate their competence, strength, and credentials, it’s the balance of competence and warmth that inspires others.
Greg was described as “serious” and “a robot.” “Do you think people are going to be loyal to a robot?” I asked him.
So, we made a plan for Greg to shift into human mode and grow his emotional intelligence. He excels at prioritizing, so he leaned into that strength and made “genuine personal connection” a daily item on his to-do list. Soon, he was learning more about his team members and they were feeling more connected to him, too.
No attitude of gratitude
Because Greg tends to focus on the end task, he quickly moves onto the next thing and never takes the time to thank his team members for their work. This is one of Goldsmith’s 20 Bad Habits of Interpersonal Behavior (No. 17: Failing to express gratitude).
The solve? Greg practiced his emotional intelligence tools by including one genuine expression of gratitude in his daily to-dos. After two weeks, I asked him for an update. “I’ve been thanking people every day,” he said, smiling broadly. “And it feels great.”
All criticism, no compliments
Greg rarely focused on what his team members did well, only what they did wrong. In fact, he often interrupted them to point out mistakes, even in high-stakes situations, like when presenting to higher-up managers and stakeholders outside the team. While Greg might think his intentions are good, he only wants the best work, which, in turn, benefits the company. The impact is that his team feels humiliated and demoralized.
Even Greg’s peers and boss noticed, saying that while other managers publicly recognized their teams’ contributions, Greg seemed like a “lone wolf.” These behaviors are linked to No. 8 (Negativity, or “Let me explain why that won’t work”) and No. 10 (Failing to give proper recognition) on Goldsmith’s list.
The fix? I coached Greg to resist interrupting his team members. Instead, practice emotional intelligence by coaching them upfront to help them prepare. Also, offer corrections balanced with praise. This practice would not only spare his team the humiliation of being corrected in front of others, it would also help Greg build trust in them.
Being a successful entrepreneur, manager, or executive isn’t just about delivering results. It’s about how you make people feel along the way. If you are successful but stuck, emotional intelligence might be what you need to break through to the next level.