The Power of Positive: The Neuroscience of Affirmation
How language leaders use with themselves shapes how they think, respond and lead
By Brian K. Perkins Ed.D.
Now that you have read the title, you might be thinking, “Oh no, not one of these feel-good articles.” And before you think I am advocating for participation trophies, artificial optimism, or the belief that everyone deserves first-place recognition, I am not. I actually believe struggle, difficulty, and failure build character. Somewhere I heard, “If every day is a sunny day, then what’s a sunny day?” There is wisdom in that question. We only recognize a sunny day because we have experienced rain, clouds, and storms.
In the same way, achievement only feels meaningful because we have known disappointment. Growth only occurs because we have struggled. And success is only fully appreciated when we have encountered some setbacks along the way. Without contrast, our victories become ordinary, and our blessings become invisible.
The same principle applies to leadership. Great leaders are not made during periods of comfort. Great leaders are tested and tried along the journey.
True leadership requires resilience. It requires discomfort. Positive psychology does not reject hardship. In many ways, it assumes hardship is inevitable. What positive psychology and neuroscience suggest is that the way leaders speak to themselves during hardship matters far more than many realize.
Remember this: Your brain is always listening to you. And the language you repeatedly use with yourself can shape your stress response and emotional regulation. That’s not motivational speaking. That is neuroscience.
At a recent strengths-based leadership workshop, an assistant principal raised his hand during a discussion about leadership identity and burnout. Looking defeated, he said, “Honestly, I suck at being an assistant principal.”
The room shifted. A few people nodded. Maybe they were recognizing some version of that thought in themselves.
I responded, “The first thing I want you to do is adjust your language to describe the fact that you are struggling right now. There is a difference between saying, ‘I am struggling with part of my job,’ and saying, ‘I suck at it.’ One describes a challenge. The other is what you are speaking into existence.”
Then I asked him a few questions.
“Has a student trusted you this year?” Yes.
“Has a teacher thanked you?” Yes.
“Have you handled a difficult situation better than you would have two years ago?” He laughed. “Definitely.”
“Then that’s evidence of growth, not failure.”
The room was suddenly full of “ohs” and “ahhs.” I am certain that people recognized themselves in the exchange.
Nothing about his job had changed. His workload was going to be the same. The stress was still there. What changed was the story he was telling himself about it. After our exchange, he was no longer seeing himself through the lens of his struggle. He understood it as a developmental moment. That distinction matters neurologically and psychologically.
Neuroscience and psychology are catching up with an idea found in Eastern religions and philosophies for millennia: As you think, so you are. Research on positive thinking and self-talk suggests that optimistic thought patterns are associated with lower stress levels, improved coping skills, stronger psychological well-being, and better physical health outcomes.[1]
Self-talk is an inner voice that provides a running monologue on our lives throughout the day. This inner voice, or self-talk, combining conscious thoughts and unconscious beliefs and biases, provides a way for the brain to interpret and process daily experiences. Negative self-talk can reinforce pessimism and stress responses, while positive self-talk can improve stress management and resilience. This matters for leaders because leadership is often emotional labor disguised as strategy.
Leaders are expected to remain calm under pressure, make difficult decisions, and project confidence even when they are doubting themselves. Under those conditions, what you say and think about yourself becomes critically important.
The Neuroscience Behind Affirmation
Positive affirmation is not about pretending problems don’t exist. Many leaders are often brutally honest about reality. The distinction is that psychologically healthy leaders do not allow negative internal narratives to dominate their thinking. Studies highlighted in positive psychology literature show that positive emotions actually broaden cognitive capacity and improve adaptability.[3] Barbara Fredrickson’s broaden-and-build theory demonstrates that positive emotional states help people think more creatively, become more open to new ideas, and strengthen social connection and resilience.[4]
Neuroscience research also suggests that emotionally intelligent leadership affects the brain activity of others. Positive emotional communication can activate neural pathways associated with openness, receptivity, and collaborative thinking.[5] Negative emotional communication, on the other hand, can trigger threat responses and survival-oriented thinking. In simple terms, leaders who consistently operate from panic, cynicism, hostility, or catastrophic thinking often shrink the thinking capacity of everyone around them. Every leader should understand these two things: 1. The brain under threat shrinks; and 2. The brain under encouragement expands.
Neuroscientists now understand that this is not simply metaphorical language. It is biological. Research on fear and threat response suggests that when the brain perceives danger, the amygdala, often described as the brain’s alarm system, rapidly activates and sends signals throughout the brain, essentially communicating, “Pay attention. Something may be wrong.”[6]
That response is extremely useful if you are avoiding a speeding car or reacting to an immediate physical threat. But leadership often activates the same neurological systems through psychological threats rather than physical ones.
An angry email from a parent
A hostile board meeting
A disappointing evaluation
A public mistake
Negative comments on social media
The fear that you are losing credibility
The brain often responds to those moments as if survival itself is at risk. Under perceived threat, attention narrows. Emotional reactivity increases. Defensive thinking rises. Neuroscientists have found that threatening stimuli activate regions associated with heightened awareness and defensive responses.[7] In leadership settings, by extension, this can show up as irritability, micromanaging, or difficulty receiving feedback objectively.
In simple terms, the threatened brain becomes more focused on protection than possibility. That is why language matters so much. When the assistant principal in the workshop saw his struggle as his identity, he was virtually sealing his fate as a failure. That matters enormously because leadership emotions spread.[8]
Leaders who consistently operate from negativity or defensiveness often shrink the thinking capacity of everyone around them. Leaders who cultivate encouragement often create environments where people feel psychologically safe enough to think clearly and contribute creatively. The emotional climate a leader creates for others often begins with the emotional climate they create within themselves.
References
Ervine, H.S. (2021), The Power of Positivity. AORN J, 114: 115-117. doi.org/10.1002/aorn.13479
Mayo Clinic Staff. (2023, November 21). Positive thinking: Stop negative self-talk to reduce stress. Mayo Clinic.
García Villas-Boas, A. (2022, February 1). Positivity is not magic. It’s science. IE Insights. ie.edu/insights/articles/positivity-is-not-magic-its-science/
Fredrickson BL. The broaden-and-build theory of positive emotions. Philos Trans R Soc Lond B Biol Sci. 2004 Sep 29;359(1449):1367-78. doi: 10.1098/rstb.2004.1512. PMID: 15347528; PMCID: PMC1693418.
Goleman, D., Boyatzis, R. E., & McKee, A. (2002). Primal leadership: Realizing the power of emotional intelligence. Harvard Business School Press.
Ohman A. The role of the amygdala in human fear: automatic detection of threat. Psychoneuroendocrinology. 2005 Nov;30(10):953-8. doi: 10.1016/j.psyneuen.2005.03.019. PMID: 15963650.
Kirk PA, Holmes AJ, Robinson OJ. Threat vigilance and intrinsic amygdala connectivity. Hum Brain Mapp. 2022 Jul;43(10):3283-3292. doi: 10.1002/hbm.25851. Epub 2022 Apr 1. PMID: 35362645; PMCID: PMC9188965.
Simpson, E. H., & Balsam, P. D. (2016). The behavioral neuroscience of motivation: An overview of concepts, measures, and translational applications. In E. H. Simpson & P. D. Balsam (Eds.), Behavioral neuroscience of motivation (Current Topics in Behavioral Neurosciences, Vol. 27, pp. 1–12). Springer. https://doi.org/10.1007/7854_2015_402