Leading Mindfully

I believe in confirmation. This means when I am planning or doing something, I become aware of leads that confirm I am in the right direction. After I wrote this article, I picked up Marshall Goldsmith’s book: What Got You Here, Won’t Get You There. The first few chapters have clearly confirmed that the article I have written on Leading Mindfully is the need of the hour for my audience this time.

My father was a man of proverbs, and I often find my life being inspired by proverbs, ancient and contemporary. Proverbs are power packed sentences, easy to remember, not so easy to do, but always inspiring! Some people call proverbs quotes. Whatever the word, here is one that has inspired me since I read it a month ago.

Maya Angelou, African-American poet, actress, director and civil rights activist said:

"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel."

Since reading this, I have begun to self examine and measure myself, not by my eloquent words or my generous actions, but by the emotional state of my audience while I am in their air space, and after they leave mine.

I have begun to catch my words that can be cuttingly critical, read sensitive emails till I am satisfied with my tone and choice of words, before I hit ‘send’, and be aware of my non-verbal responses when interacting with people.

Mindful leadership is being sensitive to the sentiments of those we lead. To do this, we almost need to mind read, because people hardly ever speak their minds, especially when they are experiencing pain and discomfort of the soul. I read somewhere that the wider the gap in the hierarchy ladder, the less people will share their minds. Therefore, the closer I am to the top, the more intentional I need to be about being mindful.

It doesn’t take a lot to learn mindfulness. Looking into someone’s eyes is a great help, because the eyes are the windows to the soul, and they often reveal what is concealed behind a brave face or a forced smile. Did you notice that when a person is putting on a brave face, they smile, but look away from you or lower their eyes? Try to look into their eyes and you will read their real response!

We often focus on doing leadership, when our actual focus should be on being leaders. Leaders who do great things are not necessarily being great leaders. But those who are mindful of the people they lead are rarely forgotten far after their term of leadership is over. These are the ones that people talk about over coffee when they reminisce the good old days!

John Maxwell, in his book ‘The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership’, talks about the Law of Connection, wherein a leader touches people’s hearts before asking for their hands. Notice John doesn’t say ask for the heart, because a heart is not won by asking, but by making a person want to offer it. Touching the heart is about being the kind of leader that motivates people to want to give of themselves to build your vision and run with it; the kind of leader that makes people follow because they want to, rather than because they have to.

At the end of each interaction, with individuals and teams, ask: How did they feel while I was evaluating them, giving them feedback, reprising them for their lack of performance. When we lead mindfully, we think of the person beyond the task; we consider the feelings without neglecting the facts; we safeguard the self esteem and self confidence even while reprimanding about a slip. We leave a person motivated and feeling human, even after we have dressed them down about something that they failed to do or something they did not do up to our standard of performance.

There are several qualities in leaders that get them where they want to be, and remembered for who they are. Visionary leaders are remembered for their ability to drive a vision to its fulfilment. Skilful leaders are valued for their ability to provide the expertise to get a job done well. Inventive leaders are an asset for cutting edge new ideas and technology. Collaborative leaders are mobilizers because of their ability to tap everyone’s contribution. But it is the Mindful Leader that wins in the long run, because the Mindful Leader touches the heart, and the heart is the deepest wellspring of life. It is what sustains when all else fails and if it fails, nothing is sustained.

I agree with Marshall Goldsmith that ‘What got you here won’t get you there.’ In my opinion, mindfulness is the cornerstone of leadership, because it leaves a lasting legacy in the hearts of those we lead. What do you say?