December: Time to Reflect, Refresh Recharge Your Relationships
By Michael J Griffin
6 minute read
I wrote a sales blog last week on “Reflect, Refresh and Refocus.” This blog got a lot of good feedback and I have now adapted it for leaders like you to inspire you to Reflect, Refresh, Recharge Your Relationships. Why? Secure leaders are people who positively develop, maintain and multiply healthy relationships in their daily lives. This takes work! Let’s dive in on these three R’s and what you can do in December to reflect, refresh and recharge your relationships for a healthier, satisfying 2025.
Reflect on Your Relationships of 2024
What would be the phrase that describes your relational leadership in 2024? The phrase that describes me in 2024 is “Be patient and more accepting(compassionate?).” Because I am a consultant, I finally realized I was always applying the high standards I train and teach to the relationships and interactions in my life at work, in my family, and as a customer. This is folly! I am far from perfect applying these standards in my own communication and actions in my life with many examples of complaining or being too critical. This was driven home to me by a good and kind Indonesian close friend who is very patient with me and was courageous enough “to call a spade a spade” when I was less patient and judgmental in interacting with others. I am clearly on the journey to be more patient to keep my mouth shut to accept and be more compassionate with others in my daily interactions! Now……Take a minute and reflect what is the phrase that describes your relational leadership in 2024, then write out a paragraph that expounds on this “relationship reflection” phrase for 2024 and into 2025.
Some more relationship reflection questions for you to assess your 2024.
Who do you need to thank for a successful 2024? List those people out and write them a handwritten note, a heartfelt email, or a face-to-face meeting with possibly a small gift. Remember not just to thank them, but give your reasons for how they have positively impacted your life in 2024.
What were some of your failures and possible relational regrets in 2024? State them and the consequences. What did you learn or how did you grow from these failures? As John Maxwell says, “Fail Forward” and possible forgive, ask forgiveness, to those relationships in your life that need healing.
Who were your mentors/coaches in 2024? What did you learn from them to be a better leader? Need to review with them what went well in 2024 and what may need to change for 2025? Do you need to find a coach in 2025? Ask!
Who have you coached or mentored? How do you feel about these relationships? Who might you ask to coach or mentor? Be courageous and ask!
Reflect on the relationships with spouse, kids, and relatives? Any issues that need to be resolved? What can be improved?
Who are you accountable to in your life, especially for areas where you may need help in? Lone rangers rarely succeed.
Refresh Yourself and Recharge this December
After a physical marathon ( I have run three) your body and mind need to recover and be refreshed to run the next race. As leaders, we are always running a “cross country marathon” of managing, motivating, and leading others on the hilly ups and downs of life and work. You may need to refresh to be ready for 2025. Here are some suggestions to refresh yourself and recharge your team relationships in December, and in Asia, through the lull till the Chinese New Year is over.
Take a Short Sabbatical. Schedule a two – three day sabbatical at a local holiday spot to reflect and recharge yourself. Good self-leadership is the foundation for leading others and you can’t lead others from burnout. For me, I will take one with my daughter Jasmine in Penang exploring historical Penang, and then to Ubud Bali with my granddaughter Lara and my trusty bicycle. Both sabbaticals I will hang out and serve my daughter as her tour guide for Penang history, architecture and Nonya food. With granddaughter Lara, I hope to be the positive influence of values and behaviors when in cross-culture environments as well as being the “explorer” of new adventures for 6-year-old Lara. No work, no stress, but in December, thrive in positive relationships outside of my work career. This kind of personal sabbatical can involve nature hikes, relaxing massage, volunteering, engaging new hobbies, and possibly a spiritual practice if you are so inclined.
Take Your Team Members on a Recharging Fun Day. Some ideas might be paintball gaming, visit to a zoo, golf range practice, an outward-bound experience or a day trip for swimming or durian! The other option here is to give you team extra days off beyond their normal vacation days. My team has December 13th to January 1st for extra time off to reflect and recharge themselves with family and friends. The idea here is stay away from discussing KPI’s or next year’s plans! Just enjoy having fun with your team or relaxing time with friends and family.
Have a One on One Development Meeting with each of your team members and staff. This meeting is separate from any performance appraisal or salary and benefits review meeting. During this developmental meeting you and your employee discuss what activities, training, self-learning, and budgets can happen to grow the employee based on 2024 reflections, and plans for 2025. I put this in “refresh” as this type of meeting should certainly “recharge” the employee as s/he sees you focus on their growth and development rather than those organizational KPI’s
Do Leadership or Team Profiles for Yourself or Employees. People always want to find out more about themselves and doing a reputable profile is a good, refreshing way for people to gain insight on how they are growing as a person. I suggest the TTISI DISC/DF Motivator Profile or Gallup Strength Finder. More detailed, in-depth profiles are Chally Profiles and Harrison Assessments. Share them to encourage and affirm your team members’ leadership with a reputable third-party profile.
Next Step: Refocus on 2025 in my Next Blog!
The process of “refocus” is to prepare a vision and game plan to run the race, not the “rat race,” in 2025 for your best year of healthy relationships yet. Your vision, game plan, and goals may vary depending where you are in life and your career. For example, at my older age, as an entrepreneur and grandparent, my goals will be quite different from the younger married couple or the middle-aged manager/leader at “half time.” The vision can be to “Multiply Healthy Relationships 2025.” A bit of a rhyme eh? Two suggestions in this blog to get you started.
Read the book Antifragile by Nassim Taleb or a summary to learn how to thrive through change and chaos. Write out specific actions and attitudes you can employ to thrive with the relationships in your circle of influence through change.
To “thrive” means to have not a “balanced life” but a “wholesome life.” Balance means for a lot of executives balancing career on one side of the fulcrum and everything including relationships else on the opposite side of the “life see-saw.” Avoid the rat race and run the journey of a healthy learning 2025 by having wholesome goals that prevent burnout.
In my next blog for you, I will give you insights on how you can have a more wholesome life in 2025 that can lead to greater success and significance with less stress in your career, relationships, and personal growth and adventure. Stay tuned for our ELAvate Lego Life planning sheet for a wholesome 2025!
If you wish to have a short insightful discussion with me on Reflect – Refresh – Recharge, send me an email or text on WhatsApp.
Have a great December reflecting, refreshing yourself, and recharging those around you.
Michael J Griffin
Founder and CEO ELAvate
Maxwell Leadership Founding Member
A Leader Who Multiplies Healthy Relationships
michael.griffin@elavateglobal.com
+65-91194008 (WhatsApp)